Ode to Brazil

Those of you who know me know I have a huge curiosity of other cultures. In my quest for global understanding and equal opportunity, this week I am focusing on the beauty of Brazilians. Until this point, I only appreciated them for the fantastic men they produce.

A Brazilian Blowout is a super awesome hair treatment that coats your hair in a keratin formula to completely rid it of frizz and is sealed with heat from a straightener so it’s silky smooth. It is applied like hair color and smells like a weird pastry as it processes. I recently had this done on my hair and it has never been more manageable or luxurious. Before the blowout I had what is professionally termed as “borderline ethnic hair,” or what I call “straight up nappy head.” It literally cut my styling time to 20% of what it was and I would pay double for this based strictly on results. (and that’s saying a lot because y’all know I’m frugal.)

Along the same lines, have you ever had a Brazilian wax done? It’s like a bikini wax on steroids. Those of you who have been there are cringing and those who have yet to go should be.

If you’ve never had hair ripped from your innermost ladyparts, let me recap the highlights for you:

·         You’re naked from the waist down.

·         Yes, it hurts as bad as you think.

·         It’s a good idea to practice your yoga poses before you go.

·         They really do get all up in your mix. I mean really.

·         You will feel like a bad ass afterwards. (if you can get that done, what can’t you do?!)

·         My favorite part was when I was told to “get on all fours with your head near the table and spread ‘em.” For a second I was really offended since she hadn’t even bought me a drink, then I remembered where I was.

 The beauty of it all is that it really does last weeks and you get a healthy dose of humility when you’re on that table. It’s kind of like the gyno without funny socks and stirrups. Oh, and they’re smearing purple wax all over your business and ripping it off.

After all was said and done, I walked a little straighter out of that building. Maybe it was my fabulous hair or lack thereof.  Either way, I think I’m at least half Brazilian now.

Moral of the story: Once you go Brazilian, you never go back.

P.S. Special shout outs to Tricia Wachsmann (www.Triciahair.com) and the European Wax Center in Allen, TX for jobs well done!