Alright everybody, I have been afforded the fantastic
opportunity to introduce you to my wine drinking partner with purple teeth,
tongue and lips from East Texas (yep, shit is gonna get live, my friends).
Imagine, if you will, Ray Wylie Hubbard’s “Screw You, We’re
from Texas” is blaring through the speaker system and out walks Mallory with
her long dancing legs (she is only 5’ 1.5” by the way-she wanted me to say
61.5” so she sounded taller) wearing power panties performing her signature
dance move, which can be best described as some combination between the cabbage
patch and running man with a bonus-we like to call it the lifegasm-to brighten
your life. Her friends and family feel it is time that the rest of you are able
to enjoy, laugh so hard you pee on yourself, random nonsense brought to you
courtesy of Mallory’s thoughts, feelings and drunken “love nuggets” that are a
daily part of our lives. Read, enjoy, learn something, laugh until it hurts and
most importantly drink more wine…
-Abby Selman AKA “Sistafriend”
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